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Dear Church Family,
I am taking this week off from my usual schedule of serving as Pastor. I would not classify it as vacation, but rather a week of decompressing, which usually means calm down and relax. Vacation also has that connotation but usually means (for me) to get away - a change of scenery and environment. My heart was feeling heavy with the same things that may have added heaviness to your life; Covid19, racial protests, and a sense that life is changing in a direction that I would not consciously choose. Life for me isn't all heaviness, but as we begin the process of moving into the future with our ministry in this era of social distancing my humanness experiences anxiety about the desire to keep people safe, bringing into our awareness the healing our nation's racial discord and living the Truth principles that I espouse. I have to laugh at the last one, having anxiety about living Truth principles. Yet, it is a real experience. How many times do I come up short in practicing what I preach?
I thought I would escape into comedies, light-hearted books, quilting, walks and meditation. Instead of escape, I have found myself in deep reflection. Remembering the bittersweet past of relationships and challenges. Especially remembering how I created issues when I did not have to. Moreover, how I did not appreciate the times, circumstances, relationships, and experiences and focused on what I perceived I was lacking. I know I am not alone here...as humans we often obsess on what we perceive is lacking in our lives. That did not change in my life until I began changing the focus from lack to gratitude. As I developed an attitude of gratitude, I saw abundance everywhere. It takes effort and perseverance to maintain an attitude of gratitude, and it compliments the larger theme of finding God's Good in all aspects of life.
In this time of deep reflection, I maintain my faith in God as Spirit is what guides the universe and that all aspects of our universe are full of hope. There are lots of dismal projections of how things are uncomfortable or unjust, but that is the shortsightedness of being human. Jesus never said the journey would comfortable or just. He only reminded us to keep our focus upon God our Source. As a Truth Student I continually affirm that I am here to grow in consciousness. Much of the time the journey is full of grace and ease. But there are moments it does not appear graceful or easy - sometimes I experience it as a wonky and uneasy. In these times I remember the experience is temporary - like the fright of an amusement park ride - it will pass. I affirm the Truth of God Presence and Power - Good and eternal.
Moreover, I am moved to be grateful for the uncomfortableness of the current moment. Grateful because life's experience has taught me that with great discomfort comes great change, a growing awareness and shift in consciousness that will benefit my journey. Each time I have opened myself up to the pain and the possibility, healing has occurred, and my life has changed in a powerful way.
I am holding this vision for you, too. If you are experiencing pain, discomfort, anxiety, sadness, grief, anger, disease, depression - if you open yourself up to the possibility of God's healing, believing that THIS experience is here to inform your soul, a powerful personal transformation may occur in your heart, mind, or emotional being. I hold the power of this transformation manifesting for you and me in loving prayer.
Many blessings,
Pastor Robert